Ode To Mothers

Happy mother�s day, Momma! I have a new found appreciation for what my mother went through in raising me since I have spent the last five months living with a newborn. I know that Reuben is an angel compared to how I used to be. My mom would tell me that whenever I got done with eating cereal or some big bowl of some kind of messy food, when I decided that I was done eating, I would turn the bowl � still full of messy food mind you, over and onto my head as spaghetti noodles would fall and hang over my ears, or as milk would soak into my shirt. Or how about how I used to throw the biggest temper-tantrums and bang my head against the wall while screaming at the top of my lungs. Wow. I don�t remember such �fond� memories, but my mom sure as heck does.

I have no idea why she just didn�t give me a bunch of cough syrup that would knock me out for the night so that she wouldn�t have to hear me scream my head off� wait, didn�t you do that mom!? :p I don�t blame you. I would have doubled the dose. :p But moms all over the world deserve more than just one day a year of recognition for all the junk they put up with. So mom, thank you for putting up with my craziness as a kid and my craziness now. I love you sooooo much!

Celebrating mother�s day here in Guatemala (dia de las madres) has been an interesting experience. Actually, they are so big on family here � especially their mommas, that they have TWO days to celebrate mother�s day. Today (Sunday) and on Tuesday, so that Mothers can enjoy a day off of work. Things were crazy today at church. To celebrate mother�s day, they started a whole hour earlier and had special presentations from kids and youth to their mothers. Then out of nowhere, this Mariachie (not to be confused with Mary Audrey) band come in and do several songs! And the house was PACKED. They were bringing in chairs the entire duration of the service, and when they ran out, people just stood up. Mother�s day in Guatemala is the day when most people go to church for the year; not like Easter or Christmas like in the States, no no, it�s mother�s day.

That just goes to show you how culture influences even the church. The sad thing is, that on Easter, it�s like �spring break� for everyone. No church has special events with special stuff, but the pastor might go on vacation, and hardly anyone will show up. I don�t like how a bigger influence is placed on mothers than Christ in that respect. But all this followed yet another, �It�s a cultural thing� of me. So, in the States, when you are hanging out with buddies and just joking around, you might tag a sentence with the words, �your mom!� For example, David says, �I want some mad cheese stixx!!� and I would reply, �You mom wants some cheese stixx!! Oooooh!!� Of course, it�s stupid and it means nothing. Well, not here. Me being �ignorant gringo from gringolandia� had to open my big mouth on more than one occasion and do a �your momma� joke with a Guatemalan. I can remember joking around with Aleman one day and saying something that had to do with �his momma� but it was in a joking format. After I said the joke I nudged him with my elbow and belly laughed at my own joke. He turned and looked at me with a face that said, �Dude, I can�t believe you just dissed my mother.�

Thinking (stupidly) that maybe Aleman was just being sensitive toward his mother, I went on with life thinking nothing of the �your momma� jokes until one day in class, a computer was giving me beef. It was not doing what I wanted it to do. The kids were busily working on some project in the lab while I was working on the computer in front of the class when an error message came up on the computer saying something like, �Unable to perform that action� and I jokingly yelled out in Spanish in frustration at the computer, �Your momma can�t perform that action!!� And Antonio immediately turns to me and gives me one of those looks that he gives me when I accidentally say something stupid or offensive in Spanish and explains that saying �your momma!� to someone is like saying �F-you!� in English. I quickly scan the computer lab for any crying children that I my have pierced their virgin ears with my unknowing Spanish vernacular. Seeing the none of the kids reacted, a sigh of relief came over me.

I guess I am beginning to wonder when I will stop offending the Guatemalan�s with my loud and obnoxious American-culture lifestyle.

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