Milk: 1 Gallon Under 1 Hour

August 22nd 2002

3

One Gallon Of Milk Under One Hour

We all know that it is absolutely IMPOSSIBLE to drink an entire gallon of milk in under an hour. Why? Well, all I know is that it has something to do with the amount of lactose the human body can handle or something. Anyway, while hanging with the band from the Deeper conference a weekend or two ago, we started talking about how it was impossible to drink a gallon of milk in under an hour. Well, of course D-well (who thinks nothing is impossible as long as he does it) says he can do it easily. The bet was on and the night had just begun.

10:15 PM: We all met in the parking lot of the hotel the band was staying at with two half-gallons of milk in hand - D-well starts sipping and we start timing. The first part was kind of boring just waiting for some action...

10:37 PM: D-well starts feeling a little woosey and he has only drank one of the two half-gallons. He insists that he must use the restroom in order to continue. We let him even though we considered it cheating.

10:40 PM: D-well returned from the bathroom ready to tackle the next half-gallon.

10:42 PM: After only a few sips, D-well is considering quitting. We all insist him to continue be he didn't until we told him we'd still give him the $5 at stake weather he spewed or not.

D-well PUKES!Still blowing chunks 10:45 PM: D-well takes it like a man. Nauseously, he picks up the half-gallon and takes about 3 or 4 big swigs of milk. As soon as the half-gallon left his mouth, the moment we all had been waiting for had finally arrived!

10:46 PM: D-well hunches over and lets the puke flow. I got a nice picture of him but I was laughing so hard I couldn't even breathe. After he was done blowing chunks he stands erect like nothing ever happened. He takes one step and BAM! He's hunched over again with some more stomach fluid for the ground.

What what is this? An update? Oh my goodness! Are you kidding me? Sam is actually updating his fricken site? It's been so long - so very long...

Ok, what can I say. I have been more busy in the past month than I have been in my whole life. Maybe that is a little bit of an exaggeration, but I have been busier than a bee. I have a new job in Versailles working as a graphic artist/programmer. It's cool. I also just got a nice MP3 encoded CD player with XM satellite radio capabilities for the truck. It's awesome. A HUGE thanks goes out to Dr. Matthews who stayed up until 2 AM with me last night/this morning installing it and saving me $40. I have to say it works very well and looks very nice even though we came very close to blowing every fuse in the fricken truck. A million bucks says you could never figure out how this would-have-been-catastrophe happened. (Ask me or Matthews about it later if you really want to know.)

Now that I am done updating what should have been on the site like 3 years ago, HAPPY BIRTHDAY ASHLEY!!! Well, it's not here yet, but oh, so close! Ashley got to wear the "Special Hat" at Don Pablo's last night. Whoohoo!

Comments

I can drink a gallon of milk AND eat a cheeseburger in under an hour.

EASILY.

I will bet 25 bucks to any man who challenges me on this.

Not only will I hold it down, I will do jumping jacks afterward.

-- Crack

Joe Crack

posted at 1:40 PM on Dec 29th 2007

 

I think i could probly do it. I mean i can drink one of those 1.33 litre milk bags in 10 min so i thinnk its possible. And besides all i drink is milk(except when im sick). I don't care what people say. Hey you have to be stupid and young to be old and wise!!!

Derek

posted at 8:06 PM on Mar 8th 2006

 

Well, now that Sam has enabled the "Add a Comment" section to the screen, I would like to tell everyone that I did not set out that day to drink a gallon of milk. When I sat down for dinner I had no idea that I would be attempting such a feat. So I had an entire meal (for me which is bigger than most of you weenies in the first place ;) ) before I even tried it. If any of you say that I am a wuss or doubt my D-Well abilities for failing, I implore you to give it ago. You will throw up. And remember it must be 2% and you must keep it down for twenty whole minutes. Perhaps someday, I'll give it another go, but for now we will all have to be satisfied with my spiraling up-chucking.

Daniel

posted at 2:26 PM on Dec 17th 2002

 

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